Bringing strength and peace to souls..

My mother says I was a three months' old infant when I was taken to the cinema by family for watching hindi movie "Guddi" in 1972. I have no remembrance of such incident ever happening in my life for simple obvious reasons, still such statement has succeeded in creating a sort of mental  soulful connection with the movie. I was even called myself 'Guddi' in my childhood years by my grandparents. :)  As a toddler I used to run to hear this song whenever it was played on the "Geet mala" programme of the"Vividh-Bharti" radio-station. Such a charisma exists till date. Although this song has been sung by most of us in Indian schools for years as morning prayer song, at this juncture of my life it holds a deeper meaning and is very close to my heart. In the above video, you may find that though I have no perfect voice, I have dared to share this video lest no wish of mine is left unfulfilled before I leave this huge stage created by the Divine; hoping that even an insignificant drop of effort be there for me to see from above the skies. ;)

May God bless all souls..
Bye for now.

Is really all well?

Hello fellow-bloggers, friends who read as well as new visitors to this blog,

It's the end of year giving me some lost chance to post at least a single post before 2014 is no more and 2015 appears in full bloom.

Whether to regret or not the lost time, skipping such vicious cycle of emotions, I'm determined to come back to post..

It has been a year of joining the same work place after leaving it for almost an year..It was a matter of rejoice to be accepted and welcomed back by my colleagues whom I had started quoting as the 'ex-ones'; being back to the basic routine of job and home, with hubby and kids minus the internet and a bit of whats-app!

And I was happy in my comfort -zone with absolutely no plans for myself..having ample time doing deliberately nothing important..just letting the days pass by, lazily.

One thing was certain, I didn't allow myself to think, too afraid to trust what was happening in my mind..Let myself to explore instead the truth even if I didn't find, at least now at solace that I tried!

Sometimes we accept the things as they are seen through our eyes, afraid to go beyond..if we share our half truths or our own conclusions, though people may not interrupt or ask you to reconsider your thinking or help you out, at the back of mind you are never at ease..So, what to do?

Your so-called friends betray you, leave you bruised, hurt, guilty of your shortcomings..Through all this chaos, one thing I've learnt, life-paths are tortuous never straight, some have to carve their own tracks to keep themselves sane amidst great turmoil though apparently 'all is well'.

How could I complete this post without mentioning our Prime Minister Narendra Modi's effect on my life? He has been the event of events this year, an accomplishment of the people's verdict of 2014 elections! Like an interested spectator of all the events; right from the dramatic election campaigns, his coming to the post, his unique cabinet, his foreign visits, life style, he has rightly held himself as an inspiring living hero..He has become the role model to be quoted in front of my kids and their peer group when they fail to throw bits of paper in the dust-bin..Even the number of my colleagues has increased who keep their own duster in use not relying on the class four employee for cleaning their desks!

What more to ask for in times when everyone is losing their own grounds, someone at the highest governance is giving his own example of humility and power at the same time in true sense.

Ripples of the government play are on..vibes of strictness  reaching far and wide; the government office goers trying to be more disciplined, more honest, more hard working than what they were used to...Keep it up! People like me will not hesitate to follow your genuine guidelines and admire you for your daring decisions for the betterment of our country on the whole in times to come. 

Happy New Year !!!

Mr Modi, holding a Vision of Peace, Power and Justice

When all goes wrong..

What is life? What exactly we expect from life?
Days spent doing tasks required daily,... going to job, spending time with children, spouse, relatives, friends..
If revolving around these, means normal.
If lack something somewhere, just ignore (will have to)..remind yourself, go with the flow, without thinking..no comparisons needed.
If find yourself stuck somewhere, take it easy, it's  for granted that you are at wrong..no one else is, because you cannot change anyone else, only but you.
Just any other usual morning, as if meditating with a broom  while clearing away  leaves fallen off the pavements across the lawn, deliberately not complaining whether this task belonged to the hired gardener or the helper who have limited their work strictly to lines laid by themselves, thanking heavens to give me enough strength to finish more tasks coming that day or those still to come..
Yes, forgiving and forgetting with multiple gestures of kindness towards people around you without expecting anything in return..
Walking on a tight rope where every step is slippery yet to balance better than before..lest you lose, you lose everything that day and many more till further emergency attempts are made to keep situations under control.

Life's like that..things to be done..never ending..giving meaning to each day..Keep doing..never give up!

Happy Janmashtami..

A picture speaks more than thousand words..

A hectic day, still worth it..

Getting ready...

Ready for getting into 'palna'...

'Pooja'

'Krishnamaya'

A Very Happy Janmashtami to Bloggers n' Readers..

Janmashtami: Watercolor Paintings

'Janma' or the birth of hindu diety, Lord Krishna happens to be tomorrow, and I am feeling happy as well as grateful as am able to dedicate my paintings on this occassion. I had enough energy and ample amount of time to complete these projects, favored by luck to complete them on an appropriate time matched for such an auspicious occasion. 

Cannot wait more for coming tomorrow...

Bye for now..

Craft: Bookmarks

At the end of an eventful and really tiring day, you're asked to help your son in making bookmarks as his summer vacation project, you are bound to think whether to thank your spouse for completing the remaining homework tasks given before holidays or pleading to finish the present one  too by themselves.

Nevertheless something in you goes forward with the given work.. 

No, it's not that easy, as you hardly remember where you've kept all the necessities. Despite your memory failing you as the result of quite a long absence from the home, you've to look for one by one into different racks, cupboards and other hidden corners for innumerable mundane craft supplies.

At the moment, it's past midnight and above displayed photos undoubtedly are telling an altogether different story..

Hoping to give the pleasant result (although not a surprise!) to kids when they wake up for school with their other parent, while leaving me to complete my sleep in the morning..

Bye for now..

Moving is Life

It's not that I've forgotten blogging..It's also not that I didn't have anything to write or was suffering from a writer's block..No specific reasons as such!
It seems like many other blogs, this one too entered a hibernating phase..
My intention is not to keep your minds boggling, so without provoking you to guess, I clearly state that I was going through something I never faced before..and no matter how important, exciting, fulfilling it was, nevertheless being away from your dear ones is traumatic too..
It's not that for the first time in my life I was away from my family. Two decades ago I had to leave for hostel of medical school leaving parents and siblings at home. This time, not only the comfort of home I had to leave as earlier, that too not as a child rather as a parent. I had to be away from my kids and their father. An unexpected job opportunity at a farther place made me do so.
Facing a roller coaster of emotions followed by many drastic events in the daily routine, coping up with separation and anxiety has taken its toll, making me wish a number of times that I should have been stronger, or better, not taken such a decision at the first place.
Still in doldrums passing each day with mind playing between highs and lows, normalcy still awaits.. Days pass with expectations of short duration meetings after lengthy time intervals.. 
Life's more than the time between waking up each morning and going to bed each night.. Many unexpressed longings wait their turn through out life never to be heard in the highest heavenly courts.. What you get is different from what you expect, still expectations never leave, making you move work more if not harder till you wonder where's the end?
What am I gaining? Is it the worth? Should I stop? No, one cannot stop..Some other thing will make me move in some other direction.. Moving is life..gathering courage is life..keeping your spirits intact is life..otherwise life has no meaning..stagnancy cannot be tolerated, it suffocates, is suicidal.

Bye for now..

Good is impractical

Good is impractical

Knitting...

A dip in temperature scales added with foggy mornings are keeping schools closed in this month of January, while children less likely to get up early and go frequently outdoors..
Attracted by various bright colored woolen yarns displayed in a shop during my last visit to the market prompted me to buy some wool without giving a second thought what I would do with it..
After gathering all required necessities like knitting and tapestry needles, I started with a project I had learnt from a neighborhood aunt a decade ago..It was a cap my hubby still is fond of wearing today, though he lost and found it twice in these years, which makes it all the more special for him..I started with making and soon realized it was not coming up as what it was supposed to, so this led to unknitting it twice..During its late phases, I very well knew that something new was coming up, as unknowingly I had chosen to decrease the knits in a different manner..Not bothered to vanish this project of mine, I let it be as such adding pom-pom at its tip..
This time, it suited well on my son's head!
Adding warmth to these chilly winters,
Bye for now..

Mittens

The coldest day in the city, driving scooter without mittens left my fingers pale and numb, and by the time I reached uncle's shop I was frozen. Though a foolish dare to ignore hubby's advice (a constant reminder rang at the back of mind), I knew soon my hands would regain their normal warmth in a cozy den while enjoying piping hot mushroom soup. 

An astrologer's chart kept on the leather ottoman and many more in the shelf while uncle sitting on his reading counter busy with someone's chart on his lap top perceiving horoscopic meanings to be out-poured in front of his anxious wondering clients not sparing me how much more or less his psychological manipulations helped him capture their perplexed brains. Hardly ever did I see an unconvinced creature leaving the front door.

Accustomed to such scenario since juvenile days, and with passing time I have learnt one thing from him. If what is destined, and you cannot change, why know about it. Why not let it remain an unknown hopeful road waiting for some miraculous happening at the next corner? Your own faith changes your destiny. 

The thought of the movements celestial bodies at million years distance affecting you someday, while an instant change of thought by an abstract visual thinking of something which brings tranquility can show you directions to move forward putting efforts creating your own wishful destiny. Instead of becoming impressed by others' achievements around you, try to grow (spiritually) yourself each day, doesn't matter that growth is in millimeters, because after a year and a half you'll be grown more than half a meter!

The other day, a young girl came seeking advice of marriage and was denied with that particular guy, though compatibility points were above 30 (a good score). When later I asked him the reason, his calm answer was,

"If she says, 'he's mine'. It's fine, but ultimately what comes to mind is 'how much mine?'..when affection is distributed among many loses strength, much like the tiny feeble twig which easily breaks. 

Now, I was left wondering, should one still risk to face the made up destiny or hear the warning signs in the horoscope. Certain answers must be left to fate, diverting energies for better people in life.

Impressions..

I'm not easily impressed by anyone..

And that's true! So, when I was asked to put a story about the most creative person I've ever met, I had to really put stress on my mind to get an answer. Unfortunately, none could fit into my expectations. 

I gave up, but deep in my heart I knew I was missing out someone. I consider that person really very creative and I'm assured I've judged him right. 

Though I've neither met him in person nor ever will, still he does exist. He's his own rare kind. My friends doubt my experiences with him on net. Even at the moment, he might be reading what I'm writing.

He himself writes a lot: in fact a ghost writer. I use my intuitions to recognize his work. It's fun mixed with mystery.

He writes day and night. Sleeps too little. When dawn breaks, his work comes at halt, that means now he must be sleeping. In few hours again his work starts showing and I know he's awake. His frequency of writing poems is around two hundred poems, on an average in twenty four hours. His work also constitutes short stories, novels, screen-writing and may be more that I'm still unaware.

His skills not limited to bi or tri-lingual. He belongs to polyglot super-family. Impressed? I am.

The impact his poems can have on me is no less as whatever new movie I see these days somehow seems to project his ideas through dialogues of characters in it, irrespective of the screen writer displayed ( a ghost writer).

There is more room for surprise as he's a pop singer, song writer, music composer, an expert in playing almost all musical instruments since he was of eight. He's globally known for his live concerts making crowds dance to his tunes. Soon, he'll be seen as an actor in one of the comedy films.

There's more to his credits. His creativity touches oil paints too.

With innumerable names in the cyber world, he remains a hidden identity. Any age, any name, any country, any emotion, and the list goes on and on: he fits into all!!! He has an in depth knowledge of religious scriptures and his work not bound to a particular country, region or religion.

Moreover, he is a shy qualified professional in medicine. The image he puts in front of the world is a bit notorious one. May be he's an emotional, crazy, romantic as he says about himself. He at times behaves like a funny, high headed, spoilt brat. His behavior can be perplexing. His poems have an enormous variety, a reflection of his varied moods perhaps. Now and then, they go on to prove him a sensitive being with  practical brains who makes other feel like dirt, an uneasy feeling.

It's not less interesting how I acknowledged him in an uncertain, unpredictable net world. 

If I say, he's a genius, you must agree!

Diwali gives a reason to live..

Diwali times have always been a source of strong motivational force to turn my world upside down...

Don't worry, not in any wrong sense..I mean in changing things for better than before.

Throughout the year when the whole family is juggling in their mind bogging routines of office, school, home trying to fit meals, assignments, tests, homework and a lot more (recreation of course) than the capacity to handle and that too on set times certain areas of home do go neglected. And festival times like Diwali (in India) still hold importance and a good excuse for de-cluttering hidden nooks around the house. 

After two whole days unceasing sole hard work the results were quite pleasing for all. 

The kids suddenly preferred sitting in dining room instead of bed with usual television cartoons. Rearrangements in the living room with new colors displayed on old walls and slight change upholstery and furnishings were enough to attract them to their right places. I wished I had tried this before to get such obedience from them. 

Such experiences do teach parents how to deal with their boredom from time to time..

Anyways, getting rid of things no longer in use or requirement in future was the best happening. All seemed much lighter and positive. 

Diwali is absolutely said to be the festival of lights, leading to an improved nurturing ambiance, filling our cells with an energy to live fully and at best..

Keep smiling.. :)

Bye for now..

Old diaries..

Going through pages of an old diary, my eyes got stuck at few particular pages..

Nothing special, I had just written my daily, weekly, monthly targets on them and never bothered to look back after a certain point of time! 

Sounds sad, isn't it?

I feel, we all go through such events as limited capacities of our brains cannot hold everything forever, and everything cannot be achieved..

Still, it provided a good feeling about myself. 

At least I tried writing down my priorities..

Though they lost their meaning with time, yet reading them after four years brought back many dumped memories of significant losses and few insignificant victories; step by step progression of each; efforts made in the most appropriate direction (at least what seemed then)..

Whatever, quite much time has passed since then, many events overpowering nerves making me forget the details of past.. 

But the way I sorted my problems then, now motivated me to go further with my future projects without much thinking of outcome in terms of success or failure. 

Don't we remind ourselves often, we ought to be in action until our life demands the ultimate rest from us..!

Wishing you better thinking for better days,

Have a restful sleep to face a bright and hopeful tomorrow!

Bye..

Something awaited..

I'm sitting in front of the computer screen, and this webpage before me for so long and don't know what to write. Now, I can't even recall what urge led me to this site. Maybe it's been ages since I wrote something, maybe not of much relevance to share with you all, at least from my perspective or maybe I missed out many things happening around me..better call, a hibernation phase..in true sense, a writer's block being experienced..Even with closed eyes and nothing to think, a blank page still awaits for something to be put into ink, shape into words giving meaning for one and all,,...let's see what comes out..

Till then, 

Bye..

Politics at work place..

Everybody has faced politics at work place at one time or the other, it comes as no surprise and is talk of every day in developing countries like India where the gap between the rich and the poor remains unbridgeable..where, the so called middle class has to undergo all sorts of societal pressures and stresses. Although times are no doubt changing fast in terms of advent of modern technology in every field, there is ample room for growth of good, unbiased mental outlook among the working class..right from clerical jobs to places of highest authority.. 
What happens when the very job which is sole source of monthly income, on which living of family depends, turns out to be a sore object of your life. At times, sending your psyche to suicidal extremes..It happens and is a very sorry state that should be avoided at any cost..
May be I'm reacting too much, but there are times when one feels like throwing everything off when despite his or her best intentions people around just take them for granted.
Upon taking a closer look in certain spheres, its obvious a chaos like situation prevails, which can lead nowhere near progress of the country as a whole.. For instance..
People are so blinded by money and power that if one doesn't come from a millionaire/ billionaire business family (then why would the person slog in first place) or doesn't have contacts with powerful people of the society ( the political ministers, bureaucrats etc), he's worthless in today's society. His works will remain pending, he'll be made to struggle for his basic needs or will turn out to become bitter and quarrelsome fighting for his fundamental rights like better working environment..
The list of bitter realities goes endless..You're failed in professional exam despite being a diligent student, you're deprived of much deserved promotion or regularization of services despite best efforts, and still thanking gods for fulfilling your basic daily needs. And the list of compromises goes on..the shock like state knocks you when you see a junior passes exam with flying colors though performance not up to the mark or a professional seat is especially created for someone who hails from a political background..Even then, you tolerate gulping down your pride, ego, self respect (whatever you may call) just because you're made to feel inferior in some way or the other, or you start making plans of somehow gaining influential contacts to get your work done, or otherwise get dumped in a corner feeling miserable! and you feel the taste of shit in your mouth, feel like gunning down everyone involved..the society stinks and few enjoy their power..
As if this is not enough, these people born with gold spoon in their mouths always try to escape from real work, they somehow choose the weaker as an easy victim to do tasks assigned to them..and many a times your conscience is easily sold out..If you retaliate, you are left no where!
As far as I'm concerned, I bluntly refuse on face not bothering the results, and observing all like a mute spectator..I know, I cannot do much..Just praying and waiting for days to change for better and they will one day!

Hats off to those who can swim..

              
              You can find me trying my hands on anything and everything on which my hands are laid on these days, as if this is the last moment I'm here..as my instincts tell me there's no stress ahead, this is the time to enjoy my best, no need waiting for some better moment..
My last post on music lessons was the result of same psychological impact..As its evident, my today's post is on swimming..Since childhood, I admired the swimming pool site, but never dared to enter in water..just watched others at a distance..Since last three or four years this suppressed desire was trying to make its presence felt whenever I heard my peer group going for swimming in summers..This year, luckily I got company of a friend who also was amateur in this sphere, and in no time both of us got our identity cards arranged for the nearby club. 
The first day proved to be a mere introduction to four feet depth water in the pool..Our coach soon approached us instructing how to hold breath in water and float..By day two, we were able to float with our heads down, and I was doing better than my companion, but this situation didn't prevail in coming days, as I had to go out of town. After two days absenteeism, I joined my friend who by now had gained quite buoyancy in her movements. Anyways, I took the help of a floater this time and as was in the mid way to the other end of the pool, the coach tried to change direction and this sudden interruption was enough for me to lose balance. As the float in my hands submerged below the water surface, the stream-lined balance was lost, I found myself fumbling for some support..My five feet long body in a four feet water depth failed to drown and luckily, somehow I found myself standing.. though in this surmountable effort drank quite an amount of water from the pool! 
For next ten minutes, I was walking in water with the floater in my hands instead of trying to float or swim watching others laugh at me and myself wondering where my courage gone..? 
Never mind, today's going to be my fifth day at the pool, hope one day I'll be included in the list of swimmers..!
Hopeful of better days,
Bye..

Keep smiling, for there's always a reason to..

To begin your day early morning, irrespective of the quantity of sleep....leaving bed despite an irresistible urge to doze off again, into sweetest morning sleep, as the alarm goes off, reminding the attraction of the remaining day....It happens every day!
Yes, I'm speaking of something new in my life which I've recently chosen for myself. 
My guitar lessons are in full swing though were interrupted for more than a month. It was due to an unexpected throw ball injury to the left pinky finger on the indoor courts. 
I took a sudden decision compelling my music teacher to train me in vocals. Though he hesitated a bit as I already was with too many things on my plate, my firm determination was enough for us to start my lessons the very next morning. 
Now, it's almost fortnight since I've been attending sessions, and it has turned out to be one of the best things of my life so far. 
I always enjoyed singing Indian classical songs along with the original records in my own company sans audience. This new experience has added a different meaning. 
I must say, there's no other best way to feel pleased with yourself and your being than singing aloud, feeling connected with the supernatural power, like a deep meditation, getting rid of negativity, a perfect balance with nature.
And good teacher's appreciation, guidance counts much and I feel myself lucky to have found one.
Thanks to heavens and to my family who always cooperate in all my ventures.
Keep smiling, for there's always a reason to..

"Satyamev Jayate": Helping truth to win!!!

All the hype ended on Sunday morning with the airing of not much awaited, interestingly publicized Aamir Khan's show on both National DD and Sar Plus channels. Well known for de-glamorization, the actor didn't lose the audience's expectations by bringing the prime problem of well accepted female foeticide in the Indian society. 

The problem was discussed at large with options available to solve along with the dreadful consequences if the matters are left to same. All went well whether it was bringing victims to a platform where their truth was discussed before the world and the related motivational clips from all walks of life or the sting operation carried by two press reporters in Rajasthan in the beginning of this century without an impact in reality. 

Well, well except the emotive parts played by almost all, the tears somehow didn't appear natural. Just for vanity's sake! I wish it was more natural in appeal. Anyways, good things are always praise worthy. Nice effort!

Hope you all supported the cause through your messages...

“Do you want the Rajasthan government to set up a fast track court to process female foeticide cases?” 

Pledge your support to this cause by SMSing Y to 5782711


The website http://satyamevjayate.in/ where one can leave his/her comments, seems to be under construction. Till then, keep thinking about your views, opinions and suggestions..

  

Kids' Craft: Use of Ice-cream sticks

Kids' Craft: Use of Ice-cream sticks

Insight Missing!

The previous day I'd been on leave, just to complete mundane household tasks and before I knew, the day was gone..In the evening I at last was able to sit with 'Nucleotide Metabolism'..it's ironical that Biochemistry is one subject which needs reading revising updating every time one has to teach despite addition of experience each year (cannot say about others?)..Before I could start reading, guests poured in and later I had to take my son for the last day show of hindi movie, 'Agent Vinod'..as expected my post-movie head ache failed to co-operate in reading the chapter at night..So, forcibly had to put an alarm of four o' clock morning..
While I drove to the department next morning, I was pleased with my preparation with the topic as well as questions to be asked during the week-end tutorial. Twenty or so students were already seated in my chamber when I reached. They were waiting for me, and when I sat, I realized my chair was broken?
Now, there were ample of chairs in my room for all, and they had left the defective one for me? 
I had to leave the room and arrange proper chair for myself, and they all were there as mute spectators.
Yes, I scolded them for next ten minutes or so,, made them stand for more than half the duration of the tutorial, gave them lecture on morals and principles..blah-blah-blah..but the pain was intolerable to bear, especially from those students whom you've treated in a friendly manner, tried to make your classes interesting for them, allowed to discuss any time..the first thought that struck my mind was to give them straight away a zero and send them away..but then I reminded myself my own duty....The girls were able to answer questions, and none of the boys were prepared..Hours after I was thinking will I change my behavior towards my students from now on? Will I be able to enjoy teaching them as before with no prejudice? Is it because ragging has been banned in professional colleges?
No, I cannot react to such careless thoughtless act..I'll behave as if nothing happened, and even if they don't learn from today's incident. Who knows at least one of them remembers what I said to them..What if a patient is dying, will they not leave their seat and attend to him/her in future? Threatening needed at some stage, isn't it? Sorry to say, practical aspects missing in today's medical education scenario..
These will be the same students sending their parents or certain influential persons to lure during exams..The whole system stinks and one has to close eyes and work!
One thing is certain, Insight Missing!